Inglourious Basterds Review

Okay. Okay. I know. I know. I finally watched Inglourious Basterds.

So… Okay. I have to admit that I’m not a huge Tarantino film fan. I watch them because my friends like them, so there is a degree of peer pressure there. Still, I haven’t seen all of them, and I’m slowly getting around to doing so.

Case in point: Inglourious Basterds… Let’s just say I was inspired to watch a movie about people enlisted for the sake of “Killing Nazis,” as Portland, this summer, has been the standoff epicenter/gathering of chauvinistic, racist, blame-shifting, violence-baiting Nazis and their antithesis group–former “critical-mass”–Antifa shitheads.

Needless to say, I was hoping to see some Nazis killed in some truly artful and gruesome means.

“So, what did you think?” you ask.

I enjoyed the film. But I won’t labor on and I’ll simply cut the loquaciousness of my response: I was a little disappointed…

They could have really killed more Nazis.

“But it’s not like they could go all ‘The Shining’ scale and trigger a bloody wave spreading out from the center of Germany-occupied Paris? Or … an Ash character cutting through rows upon rows of Nazis with a chainsaw? Or someone like Lionel using a shoulder-holstered lawnmower to chop down the Schutzstaffel (SS) like the repugnant shitty crabgrass that they were,” you protest. “There is a level of realism and brutality that both factions in the movie–both sides pushing the boundaries of Humanity–that grounded it.”

Yes. Yes. I agree and understand your point. But, truth be told, I’m spooling up the “Opening of the Ark” scene as I write this…

Now. That. Was. Nazi. Killing. At. Its. Finest.

 

 

Why are there no ass shots of your female (or male) characters on your books?

I think it’s over done. I believe there is a treatise–if not several–out there regarding this subject, but (haha, not ‘butt’) it seems a little overplayed on book covers and movies posters. True, most of these covers and posters include both male and female butts; however, what is the point, especially when it is so blatantly obvious?

Granted, it may sell more books… I myself am intrigued by a nice posterior presented in all its glory for my visual appreciation. Still, in a world of the ME TOO! this seems like a disingenuous (if not effective) marketing ploy … considering that despite how “under-sexualized” we claim to be … we are all animals according to our DNA, and hence, have drives directly associated to the phenotypes (outwardly appearances) we find desirable as a species. Ergo: nice butt, arms, breasts, et. al.

Still, unlike some weirdos out there, I’m not going to fuck a book or a movie poster. For those of you that do, well, more power to you. Just please, keep or throw the book away when you’re done with it; DON’T resell it to Powells!

 

Thank you for participating!

Thank you, everyone, for participating in the recent “giveaway” events.

I hope you enjoy my books. It is always fun to write them.

Cheers!

–LB

New novel from L.B. Sisk!

It’s here! I’m excited to launch my new book Shears Trades Swords!

Click on the link HERE to find it on Amazon.

Book description below:

Stephanie Thierson has always loved being a sheepherder on her family’s farm … and, of course, doing an occasional job for the regional Constables Office. However, because of a recent rumored escapade and growing celebrity status in the area, she’s caught the attention of a young noblewoman, Gloria Hepner, who is in desperate need of her help.

Amber Tabiare is a child of destiny … her life written … or so it was said. Because of it, she and her partner have made a very good living by selling products ranging from the latest fashions to magical items of various kinds.

By happenstance, Steph, Amber and their friends are pulled into a perilous journey that is linked to the disappearance of Gloria’s brother…

After all, an ancient evil has been hiding for centuries. It has watched Humanity spread across the landscape unchecked. And it has had enough.

 

STS-Cover_Blue Eyes-FI

Handsome: A Netflix Mystery Movie, A Review

Quirky … I guess that seems to be my taste in shows and movies as of late, since I obviously don’t get enough of that  in my life. Okay, people who know me will readily realize that I was being facetious here, but I added the “italics” for those of you who don’t yet know my snark-ish nature.

So … where was I? Oh, yes, “Quirky” and my tastes in entertainment. Like my last review of Letterkenny, my current enjoyment of The Good Place, and my re-watching of Brooklyn Nine-Nine before the new season starts, I’ve lately become engrossed with characters and situations that are a tad peculiar.

Now don’t get me wrong … I like “normal” just like the next guy and gal. AND … there is “quirky” that is not my cup of tea…

“What? Oh, do tell us,” you say?

Okay, well, I draw the line at Napoleon Dynamite … Ugh, yes, I know it’s an endearing movie. I know it got rave reviews. I know. I know. I know … All I’ll say is that I watched it. Appreciated it. Don’t have to watch it again. But, yes, “Pedro for President!”

Shit, now, where was I? Oh, right…

Handsome: A Netflix Mystery Movie stars Jeff Garlin, as the primary protagonist, Gene Handsome. You may know Garlin from Curb Your Enthusiasm, and, lately he plays the hilariously “overly-weathered” father on The Goldbergs. In Handsome, which he also wrote and directed, he’s a Los Angeles Homicide Detective, who is “overly-weathered” and, well, a bit lonely. He has the sweetest dog in the world, though … but more on that later.

He’s surrounded by a great cast of supporting characters: Amy Sedaris, who plays his lecherous (yes, I know you normally don’t call a woman “lecherous” but it’s the best way here) boss, Lt. Tucker. Natasha Lyonne, his overly-sexed partner, Det. Fleur Scozzari. Steven Weber, an egotistical actor, Talbert Bacorn, who finds a dismembered body on his front lawn. And, of course, to make this menagerie complete, he’s also surrounded by a team of idiot coworkers, an annoying neighbor and his accordion-playing wife (well-played by Leah Remini), a new single neighbor (and possible love-interest) with her weirdo daughter, a neighbor who likes to hula hoop outside, and the cutest and sweetest GreatDane (who, I believe, steals the show as Candy).

The story is what it is in the title: a mystery. Handsome and crew investigate a murder of a young woman, who is found on Bacorn’s front lawn, decapitated and dismembered. I will forewarn you in “a death foretold way” that if you pay attention, “who did it” isn’t the mystery here. Instead, it is the investigation that uncovers the life and, ultimately, the death of someone, who, for better or worse (and her own doing, mind you), found herself in a complicated web of other broken people.

The fun, of course, is watching Handsome navigate through all of these complexities … and quirks.

It is currently playing on Netflix. Give it a view.